After the recent debacle with air quality in Delhi, Supreme leader Khujliwal has ordered production and sale / use of Rajma Chawal, the staple food of the region; be banned effective immediately. The PAAP Govt. internal research team came up with this suggestion during the emergency meeting called by Khujliwal & Fumar to review the recent situation in Delhi.
Since the meeting was scheduled early morning, which later got postponed to lunch as Khujliwal had a late night Apatkali Meeting to review Ae Dil Hai Mushkil . It is being said that Karan held a special screening for Khujliwal over dinner to review ADHM. It’s a well know fact that Karan is famous at hosting lavish parties for his guest and since it was Khujliwal himself reviewing the movie, he insisted on making it super Grand. His huge fan following would help Karan to get some limelight after the recent negative publicity ADHM has garnered in return. During the dinner party, top level dignitaries were present to review Karan, top chef S Tapoor who was roped in to put up a lavish spread, and was instructed to make sure that Khujliwal would be thoroughly fed to his content.

An unknown source, who wished to be unnamed (RukRuk Khan), also present at the party said that Khujliwal was so excited with Tappor’s Rajma Chawal, he insisted on a takeaway 3 thaal dabba for home even after being served thrice in the party. This shocked some of the guest present at the party as they have been in great awe of Khujliwal to not take such favors from the entertainment industry. But someone pointed out in a dabba hua tone; Khujliwal has been trying to get a break into this industry as a backup plan if things go kaput.

Anyways, so the late night party caused all the delay in the meeting today. Finally they started at 12:30 and it’s been said things went sour right from the binging. The room was filled with a peculiar odor even after 15 air-purifiers were placed to take care of the poor air quality south Delhi is facing recently. Initially, everyone looked at Mr. Fumar for an explanation, but he seemed to be unmoved and continued with his speech over how to tackle the crisis. Khujliwal meantime was seen fidgety with his chair and ordered for a dampener.

Lunch was called in after Fumar was done with his 15mins speech. Again Rajma Chawal was served this time made by the local cook at the Govt. rest house mess. On reassembling, Fumar had prior’s commitments and he took a leave from the meeting. Khujliwal took over the mantle and between a heated debate with the researchers over ways to cope with the crisis, Khujliwal ordered to initiate a probe over the foul odor and poor visibility within the room caused do to the air-purifiers. He was clearly disturbed at the quality of the product, unhappy at their performance. Between the chaos; the researchers sitting on the other side of the dais with few photographers could not see Khujliwal as it was a huge dense cloud of smoke around him. There was pin drop silence in the room and only Khujliwal could be heard yelling full-on. Finally someone gathered courage to point out that the root cause of all the smog in the room was due to the Rajma overdose and had nothing to do with the air-purifiers or pollution outside. Since, then that person has not been seen and his name has been classified by CBI as top secret.

After a good pause, Khujliwal finally changed places with his “Dampener” so everyone could see him and said in a very soft tone, “Rajma Ko Ban Kiya Jaye, yeah mere pe shriyantra racha ja raha hai, center ka haath hai. Ismein Soda aur Modiji ka Haath Hai”

So my dear friends from Delhi, it’s not the crackers, not the cars, not the farmers burning crops in other states. It’s your backsides voicing their concern over the overuse of Rajma in your life!

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